Its been a while, but Spunk Pro has been strong! Here is the digest form of the past month in SPUNK PRO WRESTLING~!
Oct. 12
1. Ted Zannino (2:12 - The Big Sleep(er)) Matt Cafano
2. Brad Wolf (12:05 - Wolf's Bite) Tomohiro Ito
3. Dan Sommers (:23 - Alabama Nightmare) Dick Doode
4. Ken Shields/Matt D(O) (14:56 - Swanton Bomb/Golden Elbow) Lester Bourbon/Rusty Chodes(X)
5. Spunk/Jeus X(O) (13:22 - Superkick) ZODIAK/RUINER(X)
Spunk Pro ran a house show on this eve, with the highlights being taped, with the show starting out with La Cosa Nostra in the ring, bragging about their recent win over Strike Force, and that tonight there would be a demonstration of what is to come for them. Zannino then destroyed local boy Matt Cafano with brutal fists and locking in the BIG SLEEP(er) and Cafano passing out, the ref trying to pry him off, but Zannino refusing the let go. The rest of La Cosa Nostra come in and goad him on, before he finally lets go, leaving his opponent completely laid out. I'd like to tell you that this was the end, but then Rick Briggs locked in the CEMENT SHOES, while Zannino and Bianco laugh. It takes an army of refs to get them out of the ring, but wow, are La Cosa Nostra about getting the job done or what? We also got word that they are next in line for a shot at OdZ for the tag titles, and that should be in a few weeks!
Next up, Brad Wolf comes out and cuts an interview with Druid (in a suit he must have bought at his local Sears for a discounted price) where Wolf says that he is genuinely disgusted at La Cosa Nostra, as him and Lee Stone will show those cowards exactly what they deserve -- the DOOR. He wants to run them out of Spunk Pro for good, and out of wrestling. He put on a spirited match with young Tomohiro Ito, with Ito falling short, and Wolf hitting the big Wolf's Bite spear for the academic 3-count. Wolf grabs the mic and tells La Cosa Nostra that he just showed them how to get it done in the ring. Well yeah, but you didn't kill your opponent, either.
Dan Sommers came out next, followed by Big T, and wasn't in the talking mood, as Druid tried to get a few words and eats a fist to the mouth. While he is being attended to, Sommers took no time at all to destroy local legend Dick Doode with the Alabama Nightmare. It was a lariat and the Nightmare and that was all she wrote. With Big T in tow, Sommers made sure to stop by and see Druid on his way out, and punch him in the face again while Big T growled at anybody who tried to stop them. What monsters!
Newcomer Ken Shields teamed with former Dink, Matt D with his new attitude, Matt D coming out to a My Chemical Romance song (I'll be damned if I look up which one!), with his fingernails painted black and his hair newly dyed -- completely jet black! It seems like his turn from retarded boy into maturity has deeply depressed him somehow, but that didn't prevent him from winning this match! They faced off with a very pissed off Lester Bourbon, who pre-match came out eating a turkey leg, spitting it at Druid (poor Druid) for his only comment, and Rusty Chodes. Rusty got a few elbows off, Lester dominated and Matt D and Ken Shields fought hard, with the finish finally being Lester losing his temper with Chodes and his lame Dusty Rhodes impressions and gave him the BOURBON STREET SLAM. This perfectly set Chodes up for the finish from both men, each at opposite corners, Shields doing the GOLDEN ELBOW and Matt with the SWANTON BOMB! Matt makes the pin and that was that. After the match Druid tried to get a comment from Lester, who just pounded on his chest and screamed he was the king of Bourbon Street, and didn't have time for these chumps. Matt and Ken were a little bit more talkative, as Ken said he was glad to have found a partner in this crazy world, and Matt talked about how unfair the world seemed right now, as well as how much he dislikes President Bush, and how upset he was that Martha Dumptruck hasn't lost weight, so he had to dump her, and that nobody can feel his pain, not even his parents. Ok.
Our big main event was Jesus X, the newly-crowned Champion teaming with Spunk to take on OdZ's ZODIAK and RUINER. The fans were ecstatic to see the new champion, who dedicated his title win to all of the fans, and while he was less than pleased with how he won it, he'd prove he deserved it by destroying ZODIAK here tonight! ZODIAK and RUINER hit the ring, and nobody wants a piece of them, the fans backing up from the entry way, Druid ducking for cover as ANYTHING could happen when they are in the ring. The contest saw Spunk and Jesus X team up to focus on RUINER and specifically that bad arm of his, it paid off as the Champ had him worn down enough to where all it took was the Superkick and RUINER was down for the count! The faces celebrated, but not for long as ZODIAK comes out and tries to throw another fireball at Jesus X, only for Spunk to pull him out of the way! ZODIAK and RUINER scramble to the back as the faces collect themselves and Jesus X grabs the mic, calling out ZODIAK, calling him a coward who needs to breath fire to fight him.
Oct. 22
1. Lester Bourbon (2:12 - Bourbon Street Slam) Rusty Chodes
2. Big T (1:26 - Ref Stoppage) Lex Brown
3. Shogo Otsuka (10:55 - Shogo MAX Cross) RUINER
4. Strike Force (Brad Wolf/Lee Stone(O)) (12:10 - Stone Crusher) Dick Doode/Greek Nick(X)
5. Matt D (13:40 - Suicide Bomb) El Hijo del Demonio
6. Spunk Pro Tag Team Championship: La Cosa Nostra (Ted Zannino(O)/Rick Briggs (22:14 - The Big Sleep(er)) OdZ (ZODIAK(X)/DEMOS)
Lester Bourbon is a mad, mad man, and Druid knew better than to try to catch him this time, as he gets right to business, taking it to his partner from the last Spunk Pro show, but Lester refusing to actually finish him off. He finally picks him up and brings him down HARD with the Bourbon Street Slam, Chodes down for the academic 3-count -- but he won't stop! Lester with a big splash! Another big splash! He is trying to kill him, won't somebody stop this? HERE COMES KEN SHIELDS! Ken Shields just stepped in and hit the discus punch on Lester! Lester is reeling, Shields off the ropes and big golden arm lariat! Lester rolls out through the ropes and lands on his feet, retreating, kicking the guard rail and pushing Druid and his mic out of the way.
Big T took on newcomer and local boy Lex Brown, and well, it was brutal. Big T showed just what he can bring to the table in this match, as he obliterated poor Lex Brown, picking Lex up for a big sidewalk slam, dropping him down and then dropping a big elbow on him. But that wasn't enough. The ref was counting and T picks Brown up. He affixes his hand around the throat of Brown and gets him up high for a chokeslam, and it looks like Brown is tapping out! But T slams him down anyway, knocking him out cold, the ref having to stop the match! Post-match he puts in a few words with Druid, saying that this was just the beginning, and that he can do much worse. Much, much worse, then growls and moves towards Druid, Druid possibly pissing his 10-dollar dress pants!
Shogo Otsuka came out next, and talked to Druid (wearing new pants), claiming that tonight he'll take out RUINER, and that he wants to end this ordeal with OdZ, and wants to once and for all recapture the championship from DEMOS. The match was underway and it went back and forth, RUINER's arm being the main focus, when out of nowhere Shogo used the flying, hanging armbar on RUINER who was forced to tap out. Shogo was celebrating his victory when out of nowhere DEMOS comes out from behind, brandishing a pair of clippers, and he is trying to shave Shogo's head! Shogo narrowly escapes as OdZ stays in the ring.
Strike Force are up next, as both men cut an interview with Druid, saying that they are going to be watching the tag team title match very closely tonight. They made short work of their opponents in impressive fashion, and after the match called for a tag team title shot against the winners tonight. We'll see.
Matt D came out, and complained about his life again, showing us some scrapes on his wrists, saying that life can be so cruel and that he is out here to show us his pain. Ok. He faced off with El Hijo del Demonio, which is no pushover by any means, but was able to pull out the win, with the Swanton Bomb, which we've been informed is called the 'Suicide Bomb' now. Ok. After the match, Matt D moped around a bit, then left.
The main event is for the Tag Team Championship! It was an intense back and forth bout, with OdZ looking to have a slight edge, when it looked like it was curtains for La Cosa Nostra, ZODIAK prepping a fireball Jesus X, the Champ runs out and with the ref distracted by DEMOS so ZODIAK could throw the fireball left for a perfect opportunity for the SUPERKICK! ZODIAK falls into the waiting arms of Ted Zannino's the Big Sleep(er) and its over, he has passed out! Zannino won't release the hold, but Bianco and Briggs are pulling him off, the belts in their hand as they celebrate! We have new tag team champions!
Druid catches up with Jesus X who says turnabout is fair play, and that ZODIAK shouldn't play with fire, as he is just going to get burned!
