Spunk Pro December Digest

12.6.07

December was quite a month for Spunk Pro, as things start off with DanDead dismantling Joey Knuckles after La Cosa Nostra sent him out to take care of DanDead after a backstage incident where DanDead bumped into Rick Briggs, spilling coffee all over him. Post-match Zannino and Briggs dragged Knuckles backstage to meet with Bianco, and Bianco showed his displeasure towards Joey Knuckle's lack of winning edge, and claimed that he found a way for Knuckles to begin to repay them. From there a scantily clad girl came out from the door behind them and Joey's jaw dropped, as he starts shouting and crying, with Zannino laying a few fists to his gut while Briggs holds him up by his hair. Bianco explains that she is a beautiful girl and that he is sure she'll pay off Daddy's debts in no time. Uh oh.

The team of shaDow and eDo put on a blistering match against the evil luchadores, Bromista and Camello del Noche, it saw the 'Black as Love' boys just tossing themselves around with no worry about their bodies, with the Suicide Bomb from shaDow putting Camello away. The Spunk Pro International Champion successfully defended his title against Paradigm after Paradigm made such a valiant effort to win the title just weeks ago. It was a hard fought battle that saw Johnny Jett overcome what turned out to be strange odds, as Joey Knuckles was apparently ordered by La Cosa Nostra to stop at nothing to help Paradigm win the title. This would, in most cases, mean Johnny Jett made an incredible babyface comeback, but its Johnny Jett -- which means that things got fishy rather quickly. After taking some knuckles from Mr. Knuckles and Paradigm, Johnny Jett grabs the mic from the timekeeper and shouts for his 'secret weapon' to come out. This, folks, was DanDead. Danny Bell comes stalking out, laying out Joey Knuckles with a big boot, then making the sign of the cross as the fans go crazy, DANNY BOMB! Here comes Paradigm, he goes for a lariat, and Dan catches him -- chokeslam! He rolls Paradigm back into the ring, and Johnny Jett is quick to lock in the Red Carpet Rub, and this one is OVER.

ZODIAK and DEMOS are out now, and ZODIAK is running his mouth about Jesus X, as Jesus X comes out to confront him, ZODIAK claims that he will take everything from Jesus X, and that he demands Jesus X defends his title. Jesus X accepts the challenge and tells him he'll be happy to tear into ZODIAK, only for ZODIAK to laugh and explain that its not him, its not him at all. Jesus X walks off in a huff with his title as ZODIAK and DEMOS prepare for a face-off with VIOLENCE. The match played out a lot like their previous ones, just with this time Shogo picking up a much-needed pinfall win over DEMOS (finally) with the Shogo-MAX Cutter. ZODIAK was livid after the match, but regained his composure and headed to the back, dragging DEMOS behind him.

The first main event was a huge 6-man elimination tag between the Celtic Bruisers and Ken Shields against Big T, Dan Sommers and Lester Bourbon, a team to fear indeed. This match turned into a one-man show of sorts for Sean Gabriel, as Sean catches Lester with a Cloverplex after a Golden Elbow from Ken Shields, which might have knocked Bourbon out clean! Don't get me wrong, Gabriel was tagging in and out, which was the main reason for the team's success, but Gabriel just seemed unstoppable, next taking down Big T after working over his legs. He took out the big weakness for the big, powerful T with shots to the knees, finally locking in that Cloverhold and T trying to fight his way to the ropes, only for Paddy Baker to drop a few big elbows on him, and follow up with a headbutt, busting him wide open and Big T was forced to tap out! Then it came down to Dan Sommers as the lone survivor, and Dan Sommers fought like his life depended on it. Gabriel asked his teammates to stay back throughout this, as both men slugged it out for nearly 30 minutes, neither man wanting to go down. There was some confusion near the end, as Gabriel had an inside cradle on Sommers who was near the ropes and the ref counted to 3, but then saw that Sommers had a hand clearly grasping onto the ropes. This ate up whatever time was left (a good 14 seconds) and this match was declared a draw!

Sommers grabbed a mic and whilst holding the WILD International Heavyweight Championship spoke about how he was the only real champion in the company right now, and how the pro-wrestling world should be bowing to him. He made an open challenge to the champ, Jesus X, claiming that every champion of late has been ducking him.

This then brings out Jesus X for his phantom title match, as La Cosa Nostra's music hits and Rick Briggs heads to the ringing, claiming that La Cosa Nostra are true champions and that tonight he will bring home the big prize to Little Italy. It was a competitive, back and forth match with Jesus X having to throw everything that he can at Briggs who was working over the back of Jesus X, trying to set him up for the Cement Shoes (Sharpshooter). Jesus X fought through the pain, and the finish came when Jesus X missed the Saviour Kick, Briggs ducking under it, and Jesus X catch him from behind with the Final Cut for the 1....2...3! Well, we'd like to say that this was the end of this story, but it wasn't. This brought out Ted Zannino who was laying into the champ, only for a (really) surprising save from shaDow and eDo, who brawled with LCN into the crowd. It seems like some sort of deal was struck between LCN and OdZ, though, as Jesus X is laid out and waiting for ZODIAK and DEMOS, both with clippers in their hands. ZODIAK grabs a mic and tells DEMOS to hold him back while he takes away his beautiful hair from him. They beginning trying to shave his head only for YUSUKE and Shogo to run out and start fighting with OdZ, this in turn brings out Dan Sommers and Lester Bourbon who are trying to help OdZ, only for Ken Shields to come out and engage Bourbon, and Sean Gabriel coming out to attack Sommers, and we have just erupted into an all-out brawl around the ringside area. We have clippers, we have Shogo trying to rip DEMOS's mask off, this is chaos!

Manakuro Marakuso comes out with a slew of refs, agents and officials trying to break this up, as he announces what could potentially be one of the biggest matches we've seen in Spunk Pro in ages for the next show -- a Cage Deathmatch! Two teams -- Jesus X/Sean Gabriel/YUSUKE/Ken Shields against ZODIAK/DEMOS/Dan Sommers/Lester Bourbon. The stakes? It is a hair vs mask match, escape rules until its down to two men, then its anything goes -- pins, submissions, knockouts, just not escape. There is no escape come the end, only two men, and the winner of that gets to shave (or in DEMOS's case unmask) the loser's head. On top of that, the person who scores the pinfall gets to pick a match of his choosing, whenever he wants, for any title!

This hushes everybody down, as we have some tense stare-downs to end the show.

1. DanDead (3:22 - Powerbomb) Joey Knuckles
2. shaDow(O)/eDo (11:44 - Suicide Bomb) Bromista/Camello del Noche(X)
3. Spunk Pro International Championship: Johnny Jett(C) (20:04 - Red Carpet Rub) Paradigm
4. YUSUKE/Shogo Otsuka(O) (24:49 - ShogoMAX Cutter) ZODIAK/DEMOS(X)
5. Elimination Tag: Sean Gabriel/Paddy Baker/Ken Shields vs Big T/Dan Sommers/Lester Bourbon
-- Sean Gabriel (23:54 - Cloverplex) Lester Bourbon
-- Sean Gabriel (36:25 - Cloverhold) Big T
-- Sean Gabriel (60:00 - Time Up) Dan Sommers
6. Spunk Pro Heavyweight Championship: Jesus X (17:07 - Final Cut) Rick Briggs

12.20.07

After the chaos that was our last show, Spunk Pro is back at you for a night that should prove to be a monumental way to ring in the new year for Spunk Pro. The show starts off with Brad Wolf annihilating Rusty Chodes with the Wolf's Bite in just 2 minutes. Johnny Jett teamed up with DanDead, giving Joey Knuckles and Paradigm a chance for revenge from the last show, but it turned out to be more of the same, with DanDead using the Danny Bomb on Joey Knuckles and Johnny Jett making a cocky cover for the win.

Shogo Otsuka and RUINER had anouther chance encounter, with Shogo using the hanging jujigatame on RUINER, attacking the arm he injured well over a year ago for a quick submission. Shogo is calling for DEMOS again, saying he wants his title back. La Cosa Nostra responded to the unspoken challenge from the two emo boys in shaDow and eDo. shaDow cut a promo about how nobody understands them, but that after winning the tag belts somebody will have to try to understand (but still fail, how deep). Well, they didn't exactly win, it ended in a brutalization from Zannino choking eDo out with The Big Sleep(er), eDo passing out in the sleeper and the ref having to call it. shaDow wept a lone tear at the loss, his hair in his face.

This brings us to the cage being assembled around ringside. Its a spectacle to be sure of, large and ominous as the match is about to begin. When the bell rings its an all-out dash for each other, as it feels like the teams have dissolved almost immediately and its just chaos. We can't tell who is on who at this point, just that people are getting beaten up pretty badly.

At the 5 minute point a buzzer sounds and escapes are now legal -- its a dash for the cage walls, only for bodies to go flying to the mat. The first escape was Dan Sommers and DEMOS at the same time, both helping each other by kicking off any persuers from the cage. Both landed at the same time, leaving things a bit uneven in the ring. That was alright, though, as YUSUKE made a dash for the cage, pulling himself out and over, followed by Ken Shields. Its a two-on-two situation now, but Sommers is on the outside smashing a chair against the cage, trying to deter anybody from climbing. Well, this just charged up the fiery Irishman, Sean Gabriel as he climbs out and over and jumps down onto Sommers, them brawling around the arena. Lester Bourbon is quick to follow as ZODIAK has just been sitting back, waiting for it to come down to himself and Jesus X. This was his plan, this is exactly what he wanted. Now that its just down to them, its a bloody brawl, both men smashing each other against the cage, ZODIAK covered in both of their blood looking to be in all of his glory. Jesus X finally makes a spirited comeback, springing off the cage with a crossbody and making a cover for a 2.9! Jesus X is setting up for the Savoiur Kick, ZODIAK up to his feet, and he ducks it -- FIREBALL! FIREBALL! HE JUST NAILED THE CHAMP WITH A FIREBALL! Jesus X is just convulsing, covering his face as he pops back up, leaning against the ropes trying to compose himself, the pain must be so intense.. ZODIAK launches himself at him and nails him with a lariat! He makes the cover and there is no way that he can last.. 1....2.....3! Its over, ZODIAK has won and this only means one thing.. Oh no, DEMOS coming back in, and he has two pairs of clippers with him!

DEMOS is holding Jesus X by the hair, as he is still shielding his face, but he shoves DEMOS off of him, he wants to take this with honor. ZODIAK looks like he is enjoying this as he starts to buzz away at his hair, the Champ's white, blood-stained and cinged locks falling to the mat. The show ends with ZODIAK standing over Jesus X with a handful of his hair in hand, this is MONUMENTAL.

1. Brad Wolf (2:20 - Wolf's Bite) Rusty Chodes
2. Johnny Jett(O)/DanDead (6:20 -- DanDead Powerbomb -> Pinfall) Joey Knuckles(X)/Paradigm
3. Shogo Otsuka (8:34 -- Shogo-MAX Cross) RUINER
4. Spunk Pro Tag Team Championship: La Cosa Nostra (Ted Zannino(O)/Rick Briggs) (13:45 -- The Big Sleep(er)) Black as Love (shaDow/eDo(X))
5. Elimination Cage -- Mask vs Hair: Jesus X/YUSUKE/Sean Gabriel/Ken Shields vs ZODIAK/DEMOS/Dan Sommers/Lester Bourbon
-- Dan Sommers (10:08)
-- DEMOS (10:08)
-- YUSUKE (10:22)
-- Ken Shields (10:44)
-- Sean Gabriel (12:13)
-- Lester Bourbon (14:12)
-- ZODIAK (16:23 - Fireball -> Lariat -> Pin) Jesus X